Q&A 1714—Punish children until their will is broken?

As you have been around church since early days (like Mnason of Acts 21:16) I was wondering about the origin of the parenting principle taught to us. The principle is to punish the child until his or her will is broken. I blindly and immaturely practiced it, and believe this damaged my son (his soul, not his body). – K. R.

Although most of us practiced this, and it was encouraged (I thought) by the elders, I don’t believe the source is in the denomination in which you or I came to faith. I suspect the source is in evangelicalism, esp. the more fundamentalist type.

Scripture warns us who are parents that stern punishment can crush the spirit of a child (Eph 6:4). Col 3:21 reads “Fathers, provoke not your children to anger, lest they be discouraged.”

We must reject any mechanical approach to parenting, based on a naïve psychology or wrong interpretation of Scripture.And yes, you are right—and I am truly sorry—the practice of “breaking” a child harmed many.